Lifelong dreams: about to be realised

So, there's this d3o stuff you can put in fabric, so it hardens on impact (like if you punch a bowlful of cornflour+water). Apparently you can but the beanie hats - but I wonder, have they thought of putting it in hijabs yet? It would mean I could finally (finally!) realise my dreams of becoming the world's first hijabi breakdancer. Or even cycle around without having a dodgy hijab+helmet combo!

As a side note, I don't actually cycle anywhere, though I'd love to. My biggest fears would be a)getting knocked down by an inattentive driver and b)looking like a fool. Are there any hijabi cyclists around?

Post 101. (I thought that was cool)

I don't know what it is but I've got myself totally addicted to Disney songs recently. It's probably the wonders of the internet - back in the day you'd have to go out and buy a video or something to watch scenes again, now you just stick 'lion king' or whatever in youtube and voila! Instant, cheesy entertainment. And then if you're really slick you can download it and be the king of cartoons. Yeah.



It has to be the oldies though - none of that 3D animation garbage. I mean, it's watchable but not captivating and wonderful and memorable and so on - I mean, compare the magic carpet ride in Aladdin to.. I dunno... something in Toy Story. See? It was so soul-less I can't even remember it. Children these days are deprived of the magic of a good movie! Must be why they're all such wee brats, eh?

But then, in one of those moments when you're thinking deeply about something for no reason at all ('cept maybe boredom - it's holidays after all!), I started role-reversing Disney movies for funsies. Let's see...



Jasmine, a plucky street-urchin, accidentally meets Prince Aladdin, the sultan's gorgeous son who is bored of palace life and has taken to roaming the streets in disguise for giggles. Jasmine gets arrested for annoying the Prince but escapes and with the help of an evil old man (woman?) steals a magic lamp from the Cave of Wonders. Aided by the Genie within, she pretends to be a Princess of a far away land to secure the hand of the handsome Prince, and they fall in love and live happily ever after, but not before defeating evil Madhur Jafferi (I needed a name okay!), the Sultan's advisor who tried marrying the prince at some point.

Meh.

This one's better:



A beautiful French man is imprisoned in the castle of a hideous beast, a princess cursed to look like a big hairy hag until she loves to love and be loved, before the last petal of some enchanted rose falls. Our hero falls for the hag, despite her beastly form, and the beast is transformed back into a human again.

Heh. I suppose Shrek sort of did that story line - but nobody fell in love with the princess when she actually looked like an ogre, and she liked Shrek despite his looks. Obviously it's okay for a guy to look like a freaky animal and still get the hot girl, but nobody likes ugly girls. Sorry!

Or how about reversing the traditional Bollywood storyline:
Boy meets Girl
Mutual dislike ensues
Girl realises she actually likes Boy
Girl chases Boy around, singing cheesy songs and dancing in public, until Boy decided to like Girl back and they both dance around together
Random wet sari scene for no reason (use rain/fountains/swimming pool/malfunctioning sprinkler system for effect).

Turns out it's not romantic when a girl chases her love, it's just creepy and desperate! Although I've always thought that if any sensible girl had Shah Rukh Khan chasing after her and singing, she'd have him arrested for stalkerism instead of joining in...

There's a lot to be said for...

...Anonymity.

In the blogoworld, that is. For one thing, there's no risk of future potential employers googling your name to find a website full of your brain-spew, and burning your CV (and maybe even sticking the ashes in the shredder, for effect). That's probably the main reason I don't stick my name up here - nobody likes burnt CV's! (Which reminds me - in a strange way - where has my header gone? I can't see it! It's quite upsetting).

There was also an incident at uni where a staff member was searching for their name (obviously working hard) and came across a student's MySpace page wherein another student may have referred to them in passing by a derogatory name for a female dog, in a jestful manner, and the students involved ended up explaining themselves to the dean, which doesn't sound at all fun. Nope.

But the other, rather important reason, is-- oh wait. I forgot the whole identity theft thing. It's probably mostly paranoia but I wouldn't like to risk it. I don't know that an identity-thief (?) would have a lot to go on with just a name, and what I'd have that's worth thieving, but you can't be too careful eh!

But the other other reason, is that I wouldn't like anyone I know to stumble across this, then realise I'd talked about them in a derogatory fashion, and stick me in a shredder or set fire to me or anything. Nobody likes shredded limbs. I mean, I don't think of myself as a backbiter or anything, it's just nice not to have to worry that what you've typed in a moment of boredom hasn't mortally offended anyone - anyone you know anyway; the rest don't matter.

However! Through random acts and instances (and dare I say, happenings), half my family now knows that I am McPagal and McPagal am I. If you're Pakistani, you'll know that 'half my family' is substantial amount of people. Which I find cringingly embarrassing of course, but stuff like that happens. And it's not like they eagerly read every entry or anything... is it?!

It does mean that I have to watch myself more - I can't say stuff like 'I had to go to the most booooooring wedding today!' because the family might be reading, and feel differently, and shredding may ensue. That's a for instance - I always find family weddings fantastic, amazing, and perfect of course. Yep. There's also the issue of having someone I know realise it's me, and thinking 'Ew... I didn't need to know that! TMI!'. Lessons: stop giving TMI and don't talk about people without changing a great many details first...

However! (Mark II). I do wield some small power. If I was to say something like 'I love my cousins but there's one that has awful breath!' (for example), any cousin reading could worry that they were the one being referred to, and they would all brush their teeth more often, and I'd have scored the dental profession extra points - as is my wont. Ahem.

Not that any of my cousins do have bad breath. Except that one...